Addicted !

When I read writing that is better than mine, which is everything I read, because I won't read anything that isn't good, I wonder why I write at all and yet... I persist.  Clearly, my inner psychiatrist suggests, I have an addiction. 


Alrighty then, what to do?  

My first thought was to quit cold turkey.  I abandoned that line of reasoning almost immediately when the phrase "cold turkey" led me down an imaginary failed Thanksgiving dinner that I knew I would have to write if I lingered long on why the turkey was cold.  If I went to the expanded phrase, "quitting cold turkey," leftover and deli sandwiches would come into play for that is where cold turkey most often appears and I would be hard pressed to do much with that subject.  I also wondered why "cold turkey" was used to describe a way of ridding oneself of an addiction by applying  will power and no other aids. What the hell do turkeys have to do with that, let alone cold ones?

Tapering off didn't work either.  Watch I'll show you:  Tapering off doesn't work either. See I'm still writing.

I was left with only one choice, WA, Writers Anonymous.

Hello, my name is Doc Walton and I am a writeaholic.   I spend hours a day getting into a numbed out, trance-like state in which I ignore the reality around me.  The damage to myself, my friends and family is incalculable.  I know this as I once tried to calculate it and came up with twelve and I have no idea what that signifies because we writeaholics don't do well with numbers. What's that you say?  Twelve is the number of steps it takes to complete the program?  Okay, then. I'm clearly in the right place. What exactly is the first step?  Get rid of my blog!  You people are Effing Crazy?!

I'm outa here!