Watching Television

RTGFKAR watches the food and cooking channels. Last night we had chilidogs for dinner. I'm not sure those two things are related, but I have my suspicions. Personally, I don't understand why anyone would want to watch someone else prepare food. I don't go snooping around the back of restaurants to see what the chef is doing to my cordon bleu. It might be something better left unseen. Why would I, then, tune in to watch Katie the Cockeyed Cook doing something unsightly in a soup tureen? Doesn't make sense.

Ah well, to each his own. Some might ask why I'd spend four hours on a Saturday or Sunday watching Lorena Ochoa and 35 Korean woman hit a white ball around a green field in search of a small hole and to them I'd say, have you seen these women? They have really nice...swings. Besides, the action all takes place outdoors and there's nothing more fun than sitting in a comfortable chair and watching the great outdoors.

And last night, because we couldn't get the car wreck and bloody household accidents channel, we watched "When Animals Attack" and another show whose name I can't recall, but it was something like, "When Good Pets Go Bad" or "When Fido Ate Grandma." From these shows we learned to never have elephants, lions, bears or boas as household pets. RTGFKAR called our builder right after the show and cancelled our pachyderm enclosure. We also learned that some Rottweilers and Pit Bulls will bite, but, not to worry, that's only the ones who have teeth. A part of the show I found particularly interesting was the reenactments. Because few animal attacks are actually filmed, the show's producers hire people off the street to reenact the mauling, biting, mashing, spearing and occassional fine dining by vicious animals like sharks, elk and cocker spaniels on crack. I don't know what these people are paid, but I'm sure it's not enough. On the other hand, I'm not doing much lately and could use a few extra bucks. I wonder what they pay for real action videos. Hmmmm.

"Okay Gus, let's see what you got."

Maybe I SHOULD watch the food channel.