Fo' shizzle means for sure. It is important here to also know the synonyms starting with mos def. The others are, tizzite, tellivizzle, rizzle, shiznit, hizzouse, bizzatch, brizzle and weezy in the keezy. New Scrabble games will include multiple zees to accommodate these words.
Alrighty then, the new year is underway and drama lurks 'round every corner. Will Elin and Tiger pass health care reform, will Brandon Marshall and Josh McCoach oust the Taliban from the lockerroom, will Obama insist on a playoff system for Tiger's girlfriends, will Skanky Spice leave Beckam and sign with the Sox, will the U.S. soccer team be rank or ranked at the World Cup, and will all be quiet on the western slope? These are the questions on everyone's lips that need to be answered or removed with alcohol and q-tips. Stay tuned as 2010 unfolds and despite all odds and even some evens the earth and politicians keep on spinning.
I will now put the monkeymind on a leash and and walk it to a cage.
New Year's Day was uneventful. Okay, that's not true, there were events. Football games, parades, fireworks, suicide bombings and Book Fairs come to mind and that's not even to mention Brangelina and Madonna adopting more kids. What I mean, I guess, is that I sat on my...sofa all day as I practiced my resolution to sit on my...sofa
more often. Sofa is, of course, a euphemism for...recliner. (For some reason I just can't get myself to say ass.) A euphemism for recliner is...desk chair, the thing I really want to keep my...donkey on more often. I read this morning that Isaac Asimov wrote over 400 books. Now there is a guy who clearly liked sitting on his...duff fo' shizzle. Duff is a euphemism for...gluteous maximus or, in my case, gluteous minimus which is in itself a euphemism for my ass (there, I've said it) has fallen off. 400 books! I think it is Highly Selassie I will catch him in 2010, but watch out for next year when I get the hang of this sitting on my...tush.
While I'm waiting to acquire this keep-your-...butt-in-the-chair skill, I think I will go walk the dogs.
And that's mos def.
Saturday, January 02, 2010
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6 comments:
Dude, you're so hip it's scary
Ha! Yup, that's me Mr.Hip. I'm a with-it kind of a guy, the cat's pajamas, dressed-to-the nines, ready for parkin' and sparkin'. (These are hip phrases too, right?)
pops, you are one cool cat. who likes to sit on his bum (that's one you missed! i like donkey myself...)
here are some others i learned recently:
(for a hot girl): "she's trump-tight"
(when you're jonesing for a pizza): "starvin like marvin"
(when a song gets stuck in your head): "head splinter"
(when you need to bring your game): "hit it with your bigger purse!"
oh, and check yer email for an invite to a cool site!
http://www.amazon.com/Hipster-Handbook-Robert-Lanham/dp/1400032016
I'm in the mood to post links tonight.
David - fittingly enough - was the publicist for THE HIPSTER HANDBOOK!
I cannot divulge the source of my hip knowledge. Innocent lives would be jeopardized.
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