Another Rant

It Ain’t Fair, I tell Ya!


Everybody’s got one but me. A rant, I’m talkin’ about. Something to complain about in depth. Some thing that really bugs the crap outa ya. You know, bad weather, noisy neighbors, reptile dysfunction commercials, stuff like that. Well I’m telling ya right off, I ain’t got a one and that’s not fair. Oh sure I could bring up a couple of things like an achy back or a tricky knee, but c’mon! Everybody else has operations and attacks and psoriasis to write about. Lucky dogs. One guy I know says he has shingles. What the hell are shingles and how come I can’t get them? All I ever get is stuff Advil and Tylenol PM knock right out. Well of course I get like regular sick, but so does everybody else so you really can’t count that. And then there is husbands and wives. A lot of people have complaints there. You know, ugly, grouchy, farts in bed, dumb as a rock. I know one woman says her biggest complaint is her husband breathes in and out. She hates that! Me? I’m stuck with a beautiful wife who’s smart as they come and a good pal too. Cripes! What fun is that when you’re lookin’ for a rant? No fun at all I tell ya. I mean this just sucks. My car is running good, my dogs are semi-well behaved, my live in brother is a funny guy and to top it all off for crying-out-loud, I live in Boquete! Land of eternal Spring! (Okay it rains some but who can really complain about that? I mean we all like stuff green, don’t we?) So what am I left with to rant about? You tell me. The stock market? I don’t shop there. I get more value at Romeros. The government? I can’t really find one around here and I make that a good thing. War, hate, intolerance, bad attitudes and the rising cost of pretty much everything? Well sure, no doubt, you bet and like that, but truth is, I leave those to the smart people.

So there you have it, my fellow word workers, I’ve got nothing, not a damn thing, and I’m tellin’ ya right now…it just ain’t fair!

(Wait! Wait!... WAIT! There is one thing that really pisses me off, gets my goat, sticks in my craw! What’s the deal with all these people around here wearing New York Yankee caps? Don’t they know the Yankees are the team of the devil?)