The Week in Review, Sort Of

How in the world, how the heck, how in the Dickens, how in the name of God, how for crying-out-loud, - there are so many ways to say something it is difficult to choose - did it get to be Saturday already. This week has sped by so fast it has to have been on steroids.

(A congressional committee has been formed to investigate charges that the week of May 10th through the 16th was injected with human growth hormones, DHEA, which I believe means "dramatically heroic energy additives" and whatever the stuff is that makes Jamaicans run so fast. Alex Rodriguez and Barry Bonds have agreed to testify that they saw the week popping pills on a daily basis in exchange for leniency in their own cases. Manny Ramirez, on the other hand, was overheard asking where he could get some.)

The week saw a trip to Lovely and Talented Daveed for medicinal porpoises, but none were available so I went to the doctor's instead, the arrival back in Boquete of friends from Colorado and Texas, a vet visit to get the Cocker's rabies inoculations, a Friday lunch at a place called The Big Food Grill that was okay although the food was regular size, two new writing assignments, and, you know, other stuff of incredible importance that I fail to recall at this moment and likely others as well. Zoom.

My favorite news item of the week was about scientists at the Univ. of Texas who were using a South American fly to turn fire ants into zombies. The flies drop eggs on the ant colonies that cause maggots to grow in the ant's brain. The maggots eat the brain and that causes the ants to wander zombie-like from their colonies until their heads fall off. Surely, I thought, a useful science like this one could be extrapolated to include neo-cons, annoying celebrities from the sport and entertainment worlds, Osama Bin Laden and other evil doers like whoever is running the Yankees these days. Of course some of these people are essentially brainless to begin with so they may be immune.

My second favorite was a Yahoo news bit listing the countries that have the happiest populaces. Most were Scandinavian although Canada also made the top ten. Oddly, they were also all amongst the most heavily taxed countries in the world. Go figure.

I have to go now, there is something buzzing overhead.