Being Me?

It's not easy being me. Okay it's easy for me to be me, but you try to be me and see what happens. For one thing, you probably won't be able to fit into my head. I have a small head. Size 7. Can you put all your stuff in that size head? I didn't think so. Another thing is, what will you do when an idea like how come sighs and size are pronounced the same pops up? Or what is George Bush doing at this exact moment and why are we letting him? I'll bet you'd have no idea. Some parts of me you'd like though. Some parts are still fully functional after all these years. For instance, my left knee is completely unscarred and I have at least four toes that haven't been broken. You might like my attitude too. I'm generally pretty cheerful and it takes a lot to get me down. A two game Broncos losing streak will do it. That and a chest cold and I'm suicidal, but mostly, I'm up, eager and optomistic. An example of that is I believe I can get to the end of this paragraph even though at the moment it looks like a no-hoper. You see, what I've done is I've written the first thing that popped into my head to find out if it would lead me anywhere. This is another thing that you trying to be me probably wouldn't care for. I'm having fun taking the monkeymind out for exercise while you'd more likely want to cop some extra zzz's. Or maybe read about trade deficits with China. Who are you anyway and why would you even consider wanting to be me? Do you know I have a bad back and my jump shot just...isn't? Do you know I walk, talk and think with a limp? In fact I'm limping the thought right now that you need to reconsider this whole project. Because...as I've said...it's not easy being me.

Annika Sorenstam who is essentially a muscled golfing machine and Patty Hurst who trains at Taco Bell and neither of whom want to be me, are going to duke it out in an 18 hole playoff for The U.S. Open Title, ladies version, in just a few minutes which means I've got to be going. While I'm gone, if you want to be me, have at it.